I used to hate New Year’s Resolutions. What’s the point of waiting for a commercialized holiday to make goals we never intend to keep? Or maybe we do intend to keep them, but as the novelty of the new year wears off, so does our resolution to meet those goals, and we’re no better off than when we started.
As I’ve gotten older and my brain has gotten more cluttered with the hustle and bustle of the holidays, I’ve learned to appreciate the sudden halt of chaos after Christmas. The dead zone between Christmas and New Year’s when we’re not really doing anything but traveling back home and taking down our Christmas decorations, mourning the end of the festive season. It gives me time to pause and reflect on how the year went, and how I want the next one to go. And suddenly I understand why this is such a useful time for creating dreams and making goals.
But how do we keep those goals from melting away with the snow? How do we stay dedicated to making our dreams come true once the excitement dies down? These are questions I’ve been asking myself going into the new year, and as someone who has struggled with goal setting in the past, I’ve given it a lot of thought. I’ve had a lot of practice with this the last couple of years and here are some things I have learned.
Set Achievable Goals
I know this one is a no-brainer, but it’s something I struggled with for a long time. If your goals are too lofty, they are difficult to achieve, and it can become discouraging. The farther you are away from a goalpost, the more daunting it seems. Living in a fast-paced Western culture, we only have so much energy and so much bandwidth to devote to our dreams. Move the goalpost closer and suddenly it doesn’t seem so impossible.
For example: if you told me to shoot a basketball from the other side of the court, I’d say no way. I’m no basketball player, and I know I’m not making that shot. But if you ask me to shoot it from the 3-point line, I might try. I have a much better chance of making that one.
Our goals are no different. Make sure your goals are within reach so you can stay motivated to reach them. You can always set new goals later or decide to change direction once you get there.
Set Checkpoints
This goes along with setting smaller goals, but not every person or every situation is the same. Sometimes a big goal is necessary, or simply more motivating. In that case, it’s useful to set checkpoints for yourself. These are small goals-within-goals that you can check off as you go along. Are you looking to lose 50 pounds? Make every 10-pound loss a checkpoint – and celebrate it. Trying to set new habits by the end of the month? Make the end of every week a checkpoint and reflect on your progress. This can not only be motivating; it can help you determine what changes are needed to keep going and be successful.
Celebrate the Small Wins
Maybe you took my advice and decided to set smaller goals. If so, make sure you still celebrate reaching them. Celebrate those 10-pound checkpoints. Celebrate each week a new habit is being formed. Just because these goals aren’t massive or didn’t take the whole year, doesn’t make them any less worth celebrating. A goal is a goal, and meeting it is a success story and testament to your dedication. Plus, celebrating the small wins can create a positive association with your goals and encourage you to keep going.
Fail Forward
If you set a goal and don’t meet it, that’s ok. In the past, this fear of failure kept me from making goals, and honestly, it still does sometimes. So, I’m preaching to the choir, here. But failing to meet a goal can reveal a lot about us and about the situation. The fact that we fail is not nearly as important as the why. Reflecting on the reason a resolution falls apart is essential to understanding how to move forward. Failure doesn’t have to be the setback we’ve been conditioned to think it is; it’s a tool we can use to enlighten ourselves. Maybe there are some deeper issues we need to work on that keep us from meeting our goals, or maybe they weren’t necessarily attainable in our current circumstances. No matter the reason, a little reflection can help you determine how to move forward in victory.
Appreciate the Change it Brings
This is perhaps my biggest pain point. I’ve conditioned myself to think that if I did not meet a goal or keep a resolution, then I failed completely. This could not be farther from the truth. Setting goals is meant to motivate us to change something in our lives. It’s a tool, not a destination. If you set a goal and you get really close to meeting it, that’s likely much closer than you ever would have gotten without setting a goal in the first place. If you set out to save $10,000 through budgeting, and you save $9,000, that’s still thousands more than you had saved before. And that is worth celebrating. Rather than get discouraged and swear off goal setting in the future, recognize that you were more successful than you would have been, and celebrate the win.
Conclusion
Goal setting is not as easy as it sounds. It takes planning. It takes understanding your limits and working around your limiting beliefs. Often, you must sacrifice. But what you gain is more than accomplishment. At the very least you’ll learn how far determination can get you, and you’ll earn skills along the way you probably didn’t have before. There’s not much to lose. Start setting, keep these tips in mind, and see how far you get by the end of the year!
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